Freaked out....

So, my ultimate most important thing in life is my son right....and I love him more than I could even imagine. If anything ever happened to him I would be devastated and if anyone ever did anything to him...ugh...I would die. I want to protect him so much - maybe too much right now. That is my purpose in life. I am almost sick to my stomach to imagine someone taking his innocence away....

Okay, well I got a little freaked out after watching Oprah this past week. The show was about child pornography and it was completely eye opening. Not that I didn't know this existed, but just hearing the stories about what these people imagine and look at and do to manipulate kids online is disgusting and I can't help but worry about Xavier. Yes, I know he's so young right now, so this would not happen yet...but even just public pictures of him online I am removing.
So I immediately came to my blog and deleted alllllll of his pictures because I do not want some sicko looking at him and thinking anything about him. There are men that look at children as young as him and who knows what they do with his pictures. I even had some fun pictures of him laying around in his diaper and well...those were the first ones I deleted. Then I thought about it further and I don't want anyone like those men knowing anything about him either...so to make it easy I deleted everything. Maybe I will slowly get over this, but it's just not worth it to me....

The saddest was this young teenage girl was stalked online by this disgusting man and he then took her to a motel, did all kinds of awful things to her, then continued to mentally abuse her online and she eventually killed herself. This young girl was great in school, loving family, innocent and just had everything going for her. Then there were all kinds of other stories about men and the things that they had on their computers of much younger kids and videos...eeekkk I can't even type the things that they do. But DEFINITELY go to Oprah.com and watch it there. I will try and embed a video.

Here is a link of the details of this portion of the show: http://www.oprah.com/article/oprahshow/20090220-tows-online-predator

There are estimated more than 5 million pictures of child pornography circulating on the internet - and it's getting out of control. They are saying it's now an epidemic in America. They went to this guys house and there were videos and pictures of children being raped, penetrated and children in bondage. It makes me cringe. I don't even like to write the words....but I know it's important and needs to be recognized that there are sickos out there like this. And the worst part is that it was found to be on an 18-year old's computer.

One of the tips to make you and your family safe that hit home with me:

3. Be selective about who you interact with online and what information you make public.

The risks are relatively low when you stick with people you know—your family and friends. Going into public chat rooms or opening your blog up to the general public, for example, significantly increases your risk. Think before you post online any information that can personally identify you, a family member, or friend in public place. (That means in a public blog, in online white pages, on job hunt sites, or in any other place anyone on the Internet can see.) Sensitive information includes birth date, gender, town, e-mail address, school name—even photos. This information can be used to help someone find you or steal your identity.

Anyways, so sorry for deleting all my posts, but that's the story behind that.